14 February 2010

Happy Valentines Day!

Just so you know, Valentine’s Day was created so middle aged couples can rekindle their marriage for a night.  For them, they will rediscover the young love that brought them together in the first place.  Some will fail, some will succeed, and it is none of our business which happens. 


It is a holiday so people who do have someone special in their lives can find a time to celebrate it.  Granted, it is a bad sign if it is the only time it happens for those people, but they still do it.  Or for a couple who likes to celebrate random holidays.  This is the special holiday where they break out the really sappy romance things and wake up the next morning all satisfied and loved.


Valentine’s Day is a couple’s holiday, and if that excludes you, so what?  Are you upset if you don’t celebrate Christmas or Passover?  Some people don’t celebrate St. Patrick’s Day or Halloween or Thanksgiving.  I don’t think they are too upset by it because if they were, they would take the time to celebrate it.  But I have no reason to celebrate Passover, personally, because I’m not Jewish.  And a Japanese student has no reason to celebrate Thanksgiving because they’re not American. 


So what if you’re single?  It’s not a mark against you, it’s not a mark for you.  The fact that you are single is just a description that adds to who you are at this moment in the same way your hair color helps to define who you are.  It’s just a state of being that can change at any time.  And if Valentine’s Day celebrates a state of being that you are not, then forget about it.  Don’t be hating on a holiday not meant for you. 


If you have a partner, spend this day with them.  There’s nothing wrong with spending a special day with your special someone even if it is a consumer holiday.  Companies just want to make money; is that really so wrong?  Is that really so different from you?  You have to make money to pay the bills, which is why you’re working, right?  But that is beside the point.  The point is, this is a day many people spend together because it gives them a reason to celebrate love outside their own sappy stories.  What is it to you?  What are you to them?  Don’t you think it’s cute when you see a couple walking down the road, hand-in-hand?  Why dislike their holiday so much?  WHY? 


But if you are taken, and you really want to rub Hallmark in the face, buy your partner potatoes.  They are better than roses for the following reason:


IronChef Foicite: well, there's a lot of reasons
IronChef Foicite: i mean, roses only last like a couple weeks
IronChef Foicite: and that's if you leave them in water
IronChef Foicite: and they really only exist to be pretty
IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying
IronChef Foicite: "my love for you is transitory and based solely on your appearance"
IronChef Foicite: but a potato!
IronChef Foicite: potatos last for fucking ever, man
IronChef Foicite: in fact, not only will they not rot, they actually grow shit even if you just leave them in the sack
IronChef Foicite: that part alone makes it a good symbol
IronChef Foicite: but there's more!
IronChef Foicite: there are so many ways to enjoy a potato! you can even make a battery with it!
IronChef Foicite: and that's like saying "i have many ways in which I show my love for you"
IronChef Foicite: and potatos may be ugly, but they're still awesome
IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying "it doesn't matter at all what you look like, I'll still love you"

Link to quote:



On a very unrelated note: surf around that site.  Most hilarious quotes ever.  Not politically correct or family-friendly, but still worth a good laugh.


Happy Valentine’s Day to all those couples out there!

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